No Rain
by The Bickering Kingdom
Summary: Written for round 13 of QLC Written for the 100th Bellatrix Lestrange most faithful forum. Contains Slash and character death.


**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.**

**Warnings: Character death, mention slash and a whole lot of angst.**

**Written for Quidditch League Competition:**

**Prompts 10. (style) first person narrative 1. (word) aptitude 2. (word) crass Pairing: Barty Jr/ Regulus**

**Position Beater 2**

**Team Kenmare Kestrals**

**Written for Bellatrix Lestrange most faithful forum 100th Challenge. (So I'd like to dedicate this to everyone at the forum. You guys are utterly amazing and have helped me through some pretty crappy things. I'm not ashamed to say it, I love you all. You awesome funny sexy people)**

**Regulus P.O.V**

* * *

I loved standing in the rain even as a child, but I cannot feel the rain now.  
It's okay though, because I can still remember the way rain felt.

All the good things that have happened to me, happened in the rain. My first kiss, playing Quidditch, fooling round with my friends and laughing as my cousin got soaked.

My last kiss was with Barty, I loved him I really did and I think or at least I hope he loved me.

I'm dying or I am I already dead, not sure. The only thing I'm sure of is that I am no longer afraid of anything.

Barty was always afraid even though he never showed it, but deep down he was always this scared, lost little boy who was angry at his father.

I guess that was what drew me to him, anger then love.

He always had this crass way of making me laugh even under horrible circumstances. Except the last time we truly spoke, neither of us laughed at the end of that day.

It wasn't raining that day, I guess it was an omen that nothing good was going to happen. If I could rewind time now and go back to that day I would in a heartbeat.

It was Valentine's day, I hated that day with a passion since my early teens. Yet I planned out a romantic meal, brought Barty this silver dagger with a snake curled around the handle as a gift.

I had persuaded my cousin Bellatrix, to use her charms to ensure the Dark Lord didn't summon me or him.

I both loved and hated Bellatrix's aptitude to get things her own way.  
I loved and hated her.

That day I loved her because she agreed to help me for a small favor in the future. Well she's never going to get that favor.

I waited in the flea bitten room I rented that no one except me or Barty knew about. It wasn't like I could take him home to my mother, I can hear her shrill voice of disdain now.

I waited there for hours, candles melting to nothing but a puddle of wax. The food getting cold and my patience wearing thin.

He turned up with a huge grin on his face, covered in blood and a not very convincing apology.

I did what I always did, ignore that it was an issue because it was the Black family way.

We ate cold food in utter silence, in a barely lit room that had mold growing up the wall. we exchanged gifts, he got me pocket watch.

Why I'm not sure because I'd never had an interest in them.

It was moments after we exchanged gifts, thirty minutes before our last kiss. The last kiss I'll have ever that things became soured.

I don't even know how. One second we were smiling at each other and the next we were fighting about everything.

Him always being late, me always siding with Bellatrix. Him not wanting to commit, me being suffocating.

It seemed like that it went one forever, but it was only thirty minutes. Thirty minutes of repressed anger, doubts and ultimately lack of trust.

Yet neither of us stormed out or tried to work on it. Maybe if we had of done, we wouldn't have ended. I'd be curled up in his arms, I wouldn't have betrayed the Dark Lord and I wouldn't be dying or maybe already dead.

But we didn't do those things, we kissed like it was the only thing that would save us from whatever we were both hiding from.

Then we stopped so we could breathe, I wished we hadn't then Barty led me to the bed and we slept.

Just slept, something we'd never done before and something I'd give anything for again.

He was gone before I woke and I knew it was over. Because whatever we had couldn't survive, not because we didn't want it to or because we couldn't be bothered, but it was that in the end we could end up hating each other.

That every memory would be tainted with resentment and anger.

It seems stupid now. I know deep down we could have talked it through and worked it out, but no that stupid Black family trait stopped me.

Now I'll never have the chance to try, we'll never kiss again. We will never have another argument.

Never again will I have to break up a fight between him and Bellatrix, I'll never see Bellatrix or Narcissa again.

I'll never tell Andromdea that I'm sorry for telling her parents about Ted Tonks, Sirius will never know I did love him.

I'll never tell Barty I love him ever again or feel the rain on my skin.

But it's fine because I know I loved Barty and that I still love him, I loved my brother and cousins. That I'm sorry for betraying my cousin and telling my aunt and uncle.

I'll remember the way rain felt against my skin. I promise you all I'll remember, but I promise you Barty more than anyone else that I'll always remember I loved you.

I promise.


End file.
